This has been the hardest week of my life.
Following the most joyous month of my life, it seems torturous. Waiting is so hard. I search the internet for more information, images of ultrasounds, anything that will help me feel informed. I do know that about myself. I feel better when I am informed.
We did a blood test on Monday after the visit with Dr. Quimby and the nurse called me on Tuesday saying my HcG levels were consistent with an early pregnancy so Dr. Quimby wanted to see me for sure on the 21st. This brought hope. Especially for Ben.
However, the numbers are very low and not aligned with what I know about my cycle and conception day.
I feel very lost and sad. I’m trying to trust this sweet baby, our Baby J, to the Lord and know that the pregnancy is in his hands but it is so hard.